[Writing] Task 2 Traffic and transportation

The best way to solve the traffic and transportation problem is to encourage people to live in cities rather than suburbs and countryside. 

To what extent do you agree or disagree？

 

Balanced essay (30-70) (partly, partially)

 

traffic and transportation problem.

1. 몇몇의 사람들은 도시에 살면 도시와 시골간 이동을 안해도 되니까 트래픽 문제를 해결할 수 있다고 생각한다.

-먼저, 도시와 시골간 이동이 트래픽 문제를 야기한다. 예시로, 국가 공휴일이나 긴 홀리데이때 항상 항공편과 버스 등의 예약이 꽉 찬다. 고향이나 가족들에게 돌아가려는 사람들의 이동량이 많기 때문이다.

-두번째로, 도시는 많은 상점이나 필요한 시설이 밀집되어있기 때문에 교통편을 이용하지 않고 걸어가도 된다. 왜냐하면 필요한 것들이 모두 집 주변 within walking distance에 있기 떄문이다.

 

2.  그러나, 문제를 해결하기 위한 방법은 사람들이 모두 도시에 사는 것이 최고의 방법인건 아니다.

-먼저, 도시에만 사람들이 모이게 되면 도시의 교통문제는 심화된다.

구체적으로, 정해진 면적 대비 사람들이 많아지면 혼잡도가 증가되고 교통량이 많아진다. 

-문제를 해결하기 위한  최고의 방법은 오히려 사람들을 교외로 분산시켜서 도시들의 인구수를 줄이는 것이다.

시민들의 수가 적어지면 그만큼 교통량도 적어진다.

그러므로 
Undoubtedly, traffic congestions have become a common issue all over the world.

In relation to this, some insist that people from the rural areas should move to metropolitans to alleviate this problem.

I partly endorse this assertion.

 

To begin with, some people think that living in cities rather than suburbs help to relieve traffic congestions since there is no need to move between those.

Firstly, the movement between cities and rural places causes a various of traffic problems. For example, buses and trains' seats are always fully booked every long holiday seasons. This is because people tend to visit their friends and families during that time. 

Secondly, many buildings and necessary facilities are densely located, therefore, most places are walkable for citizen without any transportations and cars. Rather, people in cities prefer to take a bicycle or walk.

 

However, letting people reside in the city is not the best way to ease traffic problem. 

In fact, living only in cities provoke traffic concentrations. In more detail, if there are a number of people who live in the same allocated space, congestions and traffic volumes would increase. 

Best way to reduce traffic amount is to distribute people to various regions with balance, decreasing the population of cities. This can lead to decrease traffic congestions and problems. Making different types of satilate cities and having movement policies are also good way to solve those issues. 

 

In a nutshell, although encourging urban living may have some advantage in reducing traffic, it is not an optimal solution. A more effective way is balancing regions' populations. 

 

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Edited essay

 

Undoubtedly, traffic congestions have become a common issue all over the world. (GENERAL-BACKGROUND)

In relation to this, some insist that people from rural areas should move to metropolitans to alleviate this problem.(PARAPHRASING)

I partly endorse this assertion. (THESIS SENTENCE)

 

To begin with, some people think that living in cities rather than suburbs helps relieve traffic congestions since there is no need to move between those. (TOPIC SENTENCE)

Firstly, the movement between cities and rural places causes various traffic problems. (FIRST ARGUMENT) For example, buses and trains to and from the countries are always fully booked every long holiday season.  This is because people tend to visit their friends and families during that time. (EXPLANATION) Secondly, many buildings and necessary facilities are densely located. (2ND ARGUMENT)  Therefore, most places are walkable for citizens without any transportations and cars. Rather, people in cities prefer to take a bicycle or on foot. (EXPLANATION) 

 

However, letting people reside in the city is not the best way to ease traffic problems.  (TOPIC SENTENCE)

In fact, living in cities only provokes traffic concentrations.(FIRST ARGUMENT)  In more detail, if a huge number of people live in the same allocated space, congestions and traffic volumes would increase.

A more effective measure to reduce traffic jam is to distribute people to various regions with balance, decreasing the population of cities and making different types of satelite cities. (2ND ARGUMENT)  This can lead to decrease traffic congestions and problems. Another possible way to address this issue is by encouraging people to commute using public vehicles. This is because public transportation such as buses and trains can accommodate a huge number of commuters all at once. This would reduce the number of private cars on the road resulting in a better traffic flow. 

 

In a nutshell, although encouraging urban living may have some advantages in reducing traffic, it is not an optimal solution. (BODY 1 SUMMARY) I believe there are more effective methods such as balancing regions' populations and promoting the use of public transportation. (BODY 2 SUMMARY)

 

optimal solution = best way	최적의
endorse	지지하다, 동의하다
assertion	주장, 단언
This is because	The reason is that / it's due to the fact that~ / This happens becuase
해결 대안책 제시 시	More effective measure, another possible way

1. Deal with this issue

• 예: "We need to deal with this issue promptly."
• 실질적으로 문제를 처리하거나 해결하는 상황에서 적합.

2. Resolve this problem

• 예: "We must resolve this problem as soon as possible."
• 해결을 강조할 때 사용.

3. Tackle this challenge

• 예: "It’s time to tackle this challenge head-on."
• 적극적으로 문제에 맞서 해결하려는 뉘앙스를 줄 때.

4. Handle this matter

• 예: "Our team will handle this matter carefully."
• 문제를 다루거나 처리한다는 뜻으로, 다소 포멀한 느낌.

5. Take care of this situation

• 예: "Let’s take care of this situation before it escalates."
• 문제를 책임지고 관리하거나 처리한다는 의미.

6. Address this concern

• 예: "We need to address this concern to maintain trust."
• 특히 사람들의 우려나 불만을 다룰 때 적합.

7. Approach this issue

• 예: "We should approach this issue with a fresh perspective."
• 문제에 접근하는 방법을 논의할 때 사용.

8. Focus on this problem

• 예: "We must focus on this problem to find a solution."
• 문제 해결에 집중하는 것을 강조.

9. Tend to this issue

• 예: "It’s crucial to tend to this issue before it becomes worse."
• 주의를 기울여 문제를 다룬다는 뜻으로, 약간 문어적인 느낌.

10. Find a solution to this issue

• 예: "We need to find a solution to this issue together."
• 해결책을 모색하는 과정을 강조.